Weight Loss is Not Linear

This wont be long...

The scientist in me...likes to extrapolate and predict what the results will be for the next few months...and when it doesn't happen I get ANGRY!  

I've learned that it wont work that way. I've learned that there are trends but they are NOT linear.  So my formulas and predictions are not always accurate but that's real life. 

I have to accept that....and thats OK. 
Will I still make predictions and extrapolation...probably...its fun.  At the end of it all....there will be a trend line and I will be able to find its equation how exciting will that be...

Till Next Time,
Formulating :)

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Here Comes the Muscle!

So I've knocked off 10 pounds...most likely its all water. I can never tell.  Still meatless.  Eating well but I know that its time to bring on the weights. This is what I am not looking forward to because I know the fast weight loss is over...the muscles are going to start building and the numbers on the scale will start going loco.  I must stay diligent.  I will start looking at the fat percentage on my scale to help my mind stay at ease.  So I am hoping to lose 5-7 pounds a month at this point, if I get more than that; FANTASTIC!  In November, I will begin to add fish back into my diet....and if I have a plateau that wont kick...JUICE it is...five days to break it.  Sounds like a plan. By the end of November I hope to be at at least 16 lbs down total.  

I haven't been measuring inches  except for my waist and I am not seeing any changes there...but I can say I am sleeping better and feeling more energetic.  As I build muscle...I should start looking better even if my weight doesn't drop as fast with cardio and diet restriction alone. 

My goal is to be able to start eating normal meals and to continue to lose weight so I wont be in shock when I go into maintenance.  Experts say that building muscle trumps cardio alone because your muscles will continue to work long after the work out is over.  So when I am lounging around watching Netflix...my body will be burning up the belly.  I like that sound of that! 

I absolutely despise strength training...but I like what does.  I like the results.

Trying not to focus on my tummy as much because it really doesn't move they way I want it to...its like watching paint dry.  The little changes are not going to be seen by my naked eye...in three months (end of January) I will check again.  I should see some measuring differences by then at least one inch...

Not sure what exercise regimen I will employ next...but we will see at 20 lbs down...

Till Next Time,
Bulking UP :)

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Not Today.

Get your tissues girls....
This is tear jerker.

No more tears from this end...just frustration, anguish and disappointments.  Behind it all there is a light, there is something greater at the other side...but in the valley its a bit dark.  Today is one of those days....or weeks, months maybe.

I don't want to dress up no more...whats the point comes to mind.  No amount of makeup or clothes that I own is going to cover up the fact that I HATE EVERYTHING I OWN.  No amount of compliments will make me feel like I look appropriate because I don't feel appropriate.  No cliches or quotes will suffice today, this week or this month.

The truth is I don't like the way I look.  I don't like the way clothes feel on me.  I feel like a stranger in this house.  I wasn't always this way....I can remember when....I still have the clothes...the pictures...the memories.  When curves lived here and I drew all the attention but more than that...I felt good.  It really didn't matter what I wore, tee shirt, slacks, sweats....I was comfortable in it all.  Not today, this week or this month.

Yeah I know it will get better and I look forward to that...but the truth is I don't feel that way today, this week or this month.

Is this low self esteem?  Not sure.  I look in the mirror....I see my face everyday...Im rather fond of it...always have been. Face of Gloria, bone structure of Wallace...chocolate skin with no flaws...Im in favor of it.  Hair girls dream of....personality most imitate...intelligence unprecedented.  The ability to talk to crackheads and heads of state...baffle most people.  I enjoy me.  Leslie Dallas is a force to be reckoned with...

But there's another part of me that I just cant fix...that part of life that didn't come easy like everything else.  The part that I start and stop and start and stop...get close...life changes...and my focus does too...

Starting again...seems abysmal.  Yet I take the challenge on today, this week and this month.  I believe I can do it today, this week, this month and this year.  There are words that do help....

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.  Hebrews 12:11

There is always an answer, there is always a reassurance. Today, tomorrow, this week and forever.  Sometimes its healthy to just say that you aint happy....how can you confront why you do things...if you are not honest about they way you feel today.  When you are not happy on the inside it will show everywhere else...you wont realize it at first but you will look around and see you arent taking care of yourself the way you used to.  

I am learning to celebrate every little thing along the way...to regain what has been stolen because of my own choices.  Its promised to me...seven fold.  Its may not come today, this week or this month.  But I will rejoice at each fraction of it till I get to the end...

Why did I write this...because I wanted to.  I needed to. 

Your reaction...who knows?  My healing has begun....

Till Next Time,
Feeling better today, this week and this month :) 

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Ahhh! No food in the house...probably not true.

Did I mention my hair is mid back length?  That has NOTHING to do with this blog entry but God knows that is a big deal!  Exercise and eating veggies does wonders for the hair...that's for sure!

The point of this entry is to talk about the phrase "I have no food in the house"  I often say it...and meant it.  Ive found that this is most likely not true...

So today is day 10 without meat...well I had fish yesterday...long story...

Well I will tell it...

I forgot my breakfast and lunch which were contained in my lunchbox on the dining room table....
So I was foodless for the entire day until I got home from work...I was lightheaded and a yogurt wasnt gonna do it.  So I seared some tilapia and I'm not ashamed about it...

Back to the point...

I thought I didnt have any food in the house and I was starving...sticking to my budget I was not going back to the grocery store...so I decided to get creative.  If you look deep in your cabinets, Im sure that you can find some ingredients that will make a glorious meal.  So that's what I did...

Found some diced tomatoes, spinach and whole wheat pasta....and got to thinking...

Here's what I came up with:

2 oz. Whole Wheat Linguine
3/4 can of diced tomatoes
1 cup of baby spinach
1/2 cup of chopped onion
2 tsp minced garlic
2 tbsp Zesty Italian Dressing
1/8 c Half and Half
1 tbsp Olive Oil

Cook Pasta as directed on box
In a skillet, heat olive oil on medium low heat and add tomatoes until it comes to slow boil (salt and pepper to taste)
Add onion, garlic, Italian dressing and half and half
Continue to cook and increase heat to medium high
When onions are translucent, add spinach and cook  until wilted
Continue to stir until mixed well and add strained linguine
Toss with grated Parmesan cheese and ENJOY!

It was delicious ...I was well pleased.  

Loaded it into MyFitnessPal and the caloric count fit well into my daily count...

Just wanted to share...and write down the recipe so I wont forget it again :)

Till Next Time,
Filling my Tummy on the Budget :) 

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Till It's Gone...

"Now why you wanna go and do that?" I can hear myself upset about my belly even after making such progress...progress I couldn't see.  Rightfully so because I see myself everyday and gradual changes are not to be seen by the naked constant eye.  

Until you gain the weight again and realize you had it pretty good.  MY BELLY HAS REBOUNDED LIKE NEVER BEFORE!  The saying is true that you don't know what you got till its gone...I'll take my old belly back for 200 Alex! 

Its really amazing how we don't pay attention to the little changes good or bad that our body makes.  

6.6 lbs down since Monday and I can only be patient with my body changes.  The belly will have to submit sooner or later.  If I continue to lose weight it will have to follow suit...how soon that will happen and if it will be to my liking?  That is yet to be seen.  All I know is that it will be smaller than it is now.  Its like I am with child literally. If not for shame...I would take a picture and post it.  The beast must be contained...lol!

I am still using my gift list from before.  A present for every 10 pounds.  I got the two presents earlier this year (earrings and makeup) so I wont repeat those.  Now I cant have a gift until 30 lbs...which is NEW SHOES! God knows I need some! I'm so hard on shoes...even more so since the weight gain.  I added something else....LETTERS!

Someone I follow on YouTube writes letters to herself and then opens them as she reaches goals...she says her memory is bad so its a delight to see what she has written herself.  Here lies my problem...my memory is NOT bad and I can remember things from when I was three so that would not be much fun.  So I handpicked 7 women to write me letters for every ten pounds....they have agreed to write me letters and I can open them until the I reach the weight I have assigned to them.  Some are very excited about doing this so this should be interesting...

I will post a video of me reading the letters here...each time I get to open one.  I reserved the last letter for my mom...who has no idea yet...I will let her know at a later date.  Probably Christmas time when I can get it from her and bring it back to put on my faith wall.  

This is HARD...I wont front...I make no excuses...everyone has opinions and victories to tell but this is so individual that you cant really follow anyone but Holy Spirit who knows what will work for you.  

This month... I'm meatless....YES MEATLESS!  Breadless too...
I've been juicing and eating fruits and veggies...

I allowed myself snacks...but need to change my snacks to healthy things...like popcorn and I'm looking for other salty and sweet healthy alternatives...

Some people go cold turkey...hap hap hallelujah for you...but I'm not going that way.  I'm really trying to introduce things that I can maintain FOREVER. Habits that I will use for a lifetime and not just for a moment....cause when I rebound....I REBOUND HARD!

Till Next Time,
Slow and Steady Wins the Race :)

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#TeamFat

#TeamFat.

I hate this team! 

Yet I keep coming back...well technically I never left but I was making progress...got to 17 pounds.  Somehow some way...17 pounds is now a measly TWO.  So here we go again....

Back to juicing and eating veggies and dusting off the Wii Fit and other tools of trade.  Gotta keep trying until it works...

Seems like I always start when Im bloated already, further dampening my excitement...its been three days since I restarted my journey to health.  Logged back in to MyFitnessPal and saw how many people had made so much progress during my hiatus.  I hid my virtual face in shame.  WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN? The dreaded plauteau that wont leave....turns into frustration...which turns into me turning into the drive thru....everyday for a month...then the exercise becomes unbearable because my body is full of toxins...out of money and energy.

This is how seventeen becomes two.

Needless to say....Im back...same goal in mind....taking it ten pounds at a time....

Right now Im meatless...and starting off with low intensity workouts until I get my endurance up...

I know what to do...I just havent mastered not giving up....

Till Next Time,

Trying Again :)

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